Feeling utterly drained might be the best way to sum up where you both stand in your relationship. When you’re not locked in heated arguments, you’re tip-toeing around unresolved issues. There’s this nagging feeling that you just can’t seem to connect or understand each other anymore. Resentment creeps into every conflict, leaving behind wounds that refuse to heal. 

Life loses its luster when your relationship feels like it’s in a state of urgency, with nothing else seeming to matter. It’s like you’re drowning and desperately need a lifeline to pull you both back to solid ground – and the sooner, the better.

The Challenges are Challenging

Do any of the following sound like you?

• You find yourselves trapped in a loop of arguments and misunderstandings, struggling to communicate effectively
• You’re adjusting to major life transitions like empty nesting or retirement  
• You’re trying to find common ground on significant decisions such as deciding whether to have children
• You experience money and financial disagreements driving a wedge between you
• You’re facing issues related to alcohol or pornography and you’re unsure how to address this in your relationship.
• You have experienced betrayal, emotional neglect, or physical neglect, and don’t know how to recover
• You feel the spark has fizzled out, leaving you feeling unloved, undesired, and disconnected

Many couples I work with find themselves stuck in challenges of what I call the ‘big six’: Money, Sex, Division of Labor, In-Laws, Parenting, and Pet Care. 

You Have Communication Problems 

You’re not just arguing, you’re in full-on battle mode. It’s like watching a train wreck in hyperspeed, except it’s not a train wreck, it’s the two of you colliding. 

During conflicts you can feel the tension crackling in the air. Some days, you’re up for hours trying to work things out while other days you can’t even stand the sight of each other. You find yourselves stuck in a loop, the same issues arising time and again. It feels like the love you have for each other doesn’t seem to be enough.

Do any of the following sound familiar? 

• You and your partner are always pointing fingers at one another or keep a mental scoreboard of who’s done what wrong
  
• You both feel you’re unable to get through to each other so neither of you is getting understood
• You avoid addressing the real issues at hand, leaving them to fester 
• You notice arguments often escalate to threats of divorce, breakup, name-calling, or insults
• You sometimes feel like you don’t even like each other (let alone love each other)

And the most frustrating part is you just keep going in circles. You argue about the same things over and over again, and it feels like you never make any progress. It’s like you’re spinning your wheels, and finding a way out seems harder and harder with each passing day.

Premarital Couples Face Challenges Too

Navigating the journey to marriage isn’t always smooth sailing. Premarital couples face their own set of challenges as they embark on the path to building a life together. From merging finances and households to navigating differing expectations and communication styles, the road to the altar can be filled with twists and turns. 

As you prepare to make a lifelong commitment to each other, you may find yourselves grappling with questions about how to blend your individual lives into a cohesive partnership. The process of merging can unearth hidden tensions and differences you never knew existed. 

With the right guidance and support, you can lay the groundwork for a healthy relationship that will withstand the tests of time. Why not build a solid foundation before saying “I do”? 

Couples Counseling Can Help You Have a Loving and Fulfilling Relationship

It’s possible to fight less, with less severity, and with less regrets around things you wish you never said. Small issues don’t trigger you both and you stop repeating the same exhausting argument patterns you always have. 

• Heal Your Relationship: Experience profound change in your relationship, characterized by growth, healing, and a deeper understanding of yourselves and each other.
• Know How To Communicate: Learn practical strategies for effective communication, leading to better understanding, feeling heard and seen, and quicker resolution of conflicts.
• Forge Deeper Connection And Intimacy: Feel more connected, supported, and intimate with each other, leading to a stronger and more fulfilling relationship.
• Overcome Challenges: Navigate challenges together, such as conflicts, misunderstandings, and personal struggles, with guidance and support, ultimately rebuilding and revitalizing your relationship.
• Reach Lasting Positive Change: Experience long-term positive outcomes, including a more peaceful home environment, sustained closeness, and a renewed sense of hope and commitment to your relationship.

What Makes Me Different

In session, we are not going to do the thing you do now: focus on what happened, who said what, when, and get lost in the emotional mess. Instead we’ll focus on building actual skills so you can manage whatever conflicts come your way. We will create a lifelong playbook for navigating conflict and developing a loving friendship, so you can gain more intimacy, ease, and connection. What if your relationship felt easy? 

Here’s how it breaks down: